Reflection of an outburst due to anger

“True confession consists of telling our deed in such a way that our soul is changed in the telling it.”     -Maude Petre

Healing your guilt and shame through self forgiveness 

Learn to Forgive yourself 

Learn to let go of the past of the things I can’t control 

Self blame 

Self neglect 

Perfectionism

Scared of doing wrong 

Not open to criticism 

Self-sabotaging behavior (starting fights with loved ones, sabotaging jobs)

Accept kindness from people 

Love yourself 

Care for yourself 

Soothing yourself when faced difficulty 

Say kind words to yourself 

Whenever you find you are criticizing yourself or being hard on yourself, consciously switch to this more nurturing voice.

From a psychological view :

It may also mean that as an infant or toddler you may experience a great deal of interpersonal chaos (such as often hearing your parents fighting) parental neglect, or rage. All these experiences would have created an intense anxiety inside of you as a child. This does not mean that you will never feel comfortable and confident about getting your needs met and never be able to self-soothe.

The sad truth is that those who were abused or neglected in childhood are more likely to become abusive or neglectful of their own children than someone who didn’t have these experiences. There are certain traits that you may have that predisposed you to treat your children in abusive or neglectful ways. These include: an inability to have compassion toward your child; a tendency to take things too personally (this may have caused you to overreact to your children’s behavior by yelling, calling them names or hitting them); being overly invested in your children looking good (and you looking good as their parent) because of your lack of self-confidence  and an insistence on your children “minding” you or respecting you to compensate for your shame or lack of confidence.

Transference of your parents' or own expectation on your child.You see  your own weakness or vulnerability in your child. Those with a history of having been victimized often develop a tendency to hate or despise weakness. If you saw weakness in your child you may have been reminded of your own vulnerability and victimization and this may have ignited your own self-hatred, thus causing you to lash out at your child.

You were an imperfect, fallible human being and like all humans sometimes do, you acted in ways that hurt someone else. Honor the limitations of your human imperfection. Have compassion for yourself. Forgive yourself.

If you have learned from your mistake, and do not wish to repeat it, then you no longer need to feel guilt or shame about it. Forgive yourself and let it go.